where does the line go

so today is sunday and i am home from church earlier than usual. in all honesty i left church.
sacrament meeting was fine. cuddled with kyla during the hymns, singing and helping her read.
then i went to gospel doctrine/sunday school. and today's lesson is on the churcha nd the government. why as members of the church we should be active in the government blah blah blah.. how we choose our leaders...
it could be an ok lesson, a lesson appropriate and good. all of that. keep in mind that i dont have the typical mormon views. i am more liberal than most. i am someone that doesn't necessarily think byu is the greates school ever. i am someone that doesn't always feel that religion has a place in education. and the idea of a theocracy sometimes scares me. which is why i am anti church involvement in government because id ont want something i love so much and feel so strongly about the be pulled through the mud and to become corrupted. and yeah i know that it is the church of christ and it is perfect.. the kicker is the church is perfect - but the people are not. some people are trying, but people are imperfect. it would be ideal if everyone was doing everything they could and everything they should but we all know that there are people who aren't. so i am hesitant to vote for someone just because they are LDS....
so it started off good, talking about what the government is for. why it is good.. it set up to protect people etc... in the back of my mind i am thinking, it is good and allof that when it is run by righteous people, but we know that the government has become corrupted. we know that it is not as perfect as it could be. gone are the days of noblemen like washington, jefferson, loncoln. yes they weren't perfect. we know thomas jefferson and his slave sallie hooked up and had posterity. yeah whatever. but it was the idea that the men were patriots. i dont know that we have any left. and that bothers me. i dont know that i have a government that i believe in.
so we had class.. and immediately someone started talking about how the government is there to punish the criminals... but then there's a mopb of 100 men who kills people and nothing is done..what about that? and it was just irritating. (the murders of joseph and hyrum smith are recorded int he doctrine and covenants section 135. today's lesson on the government was in doctrine and covenants section 134.)
we talked about how do we get involved with the government. do we tryt og et out of jury duty or do we serve? the righ answer is 'we should serve'. my answer is i get out of it because my brother is felon, he was the defendant in a court case, my father in law is a fire chief, and we know police officers and MPS. all enough to get you excused from jury duty.
then we get intot he point of how do you choose your next candidate? someoen brought in well you should get to know them, listen to them... that sort of thing. and i started laughing out loud. and the teacher looked at me. i siad, 'its all well and good to listen to them, but we come into a problem when someoen can't string two words together.. i watched the debates, and neither one of them, ever, EVER answered a question. they allsmoke screened, dropped names and evaded the questions.. the biggest thing we have to rely on is we have to study it out in our minds, pray about it and follow the promptings. and if you dont feel you can vote for either one, then write in, or leave it blank...' i didn't tell them i voted thatw e should returnt o britain and a monacrhy with a parliament and all of that because i think we screwed up so miserably over here.
and then th class started getting more into, wel should we run for governor.. and how one man, a state rep form PA actually resignd because he oculdn't stay in his job and maintain his honesty.. and someone said 'wellt hat didn't accomlish anything..' and i wanted to smack them. so i walked out of the class.
i went out and sat in the hall way and read my scriptures and came home from church when mum took my sister home. the answer i gave as to why i was out int he hallwas i didn't feel like getting into a governmental debate in gospel doctrine class. and thenin the car, i appreciate sara's advice, was well you are responsible for your spiritual experiences. you are responsible for that class too, . but i had heard it all before.. i appreciate the advice, and i know its sara's job as the big sister, i just had heard it word for word before.. and i just wanted to go home. i felt that my objection by leaving was enough.. but i guess iw as supposed ot stay there and endure it and all of that. i dont see a point to it.
i know my general opinions about the government are different than others. i also dont see why if someoen should protest at BYU theys hould be arested. save for the fact that it's BYU and private property and a religious institution? i just chock it up to being BYU and you just dont do those things at church. therefore you dont do them at byu? i dont know..
i just really think government should be discussed carefully in church if at all...

i guess i know i'm different. i can discuss the bible and book of mormon as pieces of literature. i have respect for and appreciation for other religions. my favorite saint is st jude (and mother theresa though she's not been cannonized, yet...) i think judaism is gorgeous and i think there is so much to learn from the buddha and all of that. i'm very open minded about a LOT of things. and it seems there are a lot of people around me who aren't. it seems like it gets me in toruble, or mixing the pot... it just gets hard.

but on a happy note.. we looked at a car yesterday - it is official our goldie is going to the happy honda hunting grounds tomorrow... the car we looked at is a saturn sc 2 coupe, 1997... a little racer. and rylan really likes it. i like it too. so we're thinking about it and praying about it and making sure before we do anything. but we'll make a decision very soon.

and i just got to chat with one of my dearest and best friends online who i miss desperately. and it was nice.. :) he and his wife moved away for the military.. but they are still very very dear to us...